Every story has a beginning and our’s started four years ago. 

Josh and I got married in November 2015 and after some time we decided that we were ready to expand our family. Alana and Elliott bring such joy to our lives and we knew that we wanted to have a big family (insert vision of huge dining room table with chaotic but beautiful scenes of Thanksgiving, Christmas and Birthday dinners here). 

While the beginning of this journey was very hopeful, we realized that we had reached a point where we needed extra support in getting pregnant. After undergoing many tests, there were no findings on the cause of our infertility - a message we looked at with mixed feelings because it gave us no concrete answer as to why we weren't successful. The next logical step was to go through IUI and if that wouldn’t get us pregnant to move on to IVF. At that point in time, we didn’t think much about IVF and we hoped that IUI would be successful for us. 

We started IUI in the second half of 2021. For us, this was a minor and quick procedure during the right time of the month that required no medications at all. We simply had to track my ovulation window and go to the clinic when the timing was optimal. We went once and then again the following month. November came and we started to think seriously about next steps if the third time wasn’t successful yet again. In our heads we set a deadline - if we are not pregnant by December we would find a clinic for IVF and set up appointments as early in January as we could. As you can already imagine, the third round of IUI did not get us pregnant. Our sadness over the failure of IUI was replaced by new hope as we heard stories from other couples that started IVF and were pregnant just two months after the initial consult appointment (note to self- people telling stories like this are the exception not the norm and you rarely ever hear about the norm! This will save you lots of tears). 

January came and we had our first appointment at an IVF clinic. Everyone was very nice and welcoming, and based on the full waiting room we quickly learned that we were not alone in our journey of infertility. We underwent another round of tests, lab work and training for the many (MANY!!) medications that I would need to take and Josh would have to inject. By the beginning of March 2022 my eggs were ready to be retrieved and we could finally enter the transfer phase of IVF. I vividly remember the two of us being so excited when we heard that the retrieval was successful and we had gotten a good number of quality eggs. The appointment for the first transfer came and everything went smoothly. We even received a beautiful little folder with a picture of the little egg that was now inside of me, hoping this would be the first “picture” of our future baby. The first blood pregnancy test looked great and we both couldn’t believe it. We had never EVER gotten this far! But just a few days later my hCG levels were dropping and one week before Easter I miscarried. We were devastated. 

Discussions with the IVF clinic went on and we set a plan to proceed a second time with no changes to medication doses. With the second round came also another round of hope. We did as we had done before: medications and timed injections, lab visits and blood draws. When my body had reached the optimal window we were ready to go back in and receive our second transfer. Everything went smoothly and the first blood test came back positive. Could this be it? We were incredibly cautious in getting too ahead of ourselves this time around but also wanted to be excited. It was such a mix of emotions! The results from the second blood draw one week later came in and showed that my hCG levels were once again sinking. I was having yet another miscarage. 

To this day we have no idea why it was such a rocky road for us. I remember before the initial start of the IVF procedures we even got a call from the clinic asking us if we were sure we wanted to proceed because mine and Josh’s levels looked so good. 

Sometimes things simply happen for a reason but that doesn’t make this  journey a less painful one. With every new month came another round of hope just to be diminished over and over again. 

You might be able to guess now how surprised we were when we did end up getting pregnant completely naturally. 

As summer break was approaching for the kids and our travel plans were coming up we decided to take a step back from IVF, realizing that it would be too difficult to juggle it all. We were able to spend a wonderful time with family in Utah and had the most amazing time with friends and family in Germany. 

I don’t know what it was in the end: the mountains of Utah, the German food and beer, the good company with friends and family or simply just taking our thoughts off infertility. We came back from Germany on August 29th and on September 14th I took a pregnancy test that was positive. 

Going through all the pictures, writing down this story and re-living these memories (all while being pregnant) I feel mostly one emotion: an incredible full heart to not have been alone on this journey. Thank you to family members, our parents and friends for all the encouraging words, prayers and thoughts. Your support means the world to us! And the biggest shout out to this amazing man on my side, there is no place I would rather be in good times and bad times. 

It is now with a very happy and full heart that we prepare for the arrival of our baby girl. Our home is already filled with so much love for her and we cannot wait to meet her.